By Katie O'Rourke | 3 minute read
One of my adult students refers to any particularly challenging but inspiring piece of piano music as his "nemesis." Although I believe we should love our piano repertoire, the word "nemesis" kept popping into my head as I recently reencountered Bach's Fugue in C-Sharp Minor from Book 2 of the Well-Tempered Clavier.
A decade ago, this piece had pushed me to my limits and this past week, I noticed that my habitual way of playing this fugue was ingrained like a perfectly preserved time capsule. Oh, the horrors I found.
It had obviously been a rushed job. But more importantly, I was lacking a fundamental understanding of how my hand operated. This time, I actually felt offended by the ways I forced my fingers to stretch wide distances under the pressure of an unrealistically fast tempo.
Putting repertoire aside for a very long time provides a fresh and indispensable vantage point. I felt a deep sense of empathy for my past self, and was able to acknowledge that ways in which my drive to overcome the inadequacies of having a small hand had shaped my playing.
As I practiced this fugue, reflecting on my old approach and my new one, I noted my observations and wanted to share them with you!
Intense 'pressure cooker' practice sessions, where we relentlessly push ourselves to conquer a challenge, will never lead to natural, healthy playing.
Our experiences shape us profoundly. If our practice is steeped in fear, that fear becomes embedded in our playing. Conversely, if we foster a sense of safety, this too becomes an intrinsic part of our approach.
The subtle physical sensations that guide our technique will emerge naturally, but only when we create a safe and supportive environment for them to flourish.
We can craft a healthier learning environment by broadening our goals beyond the specific content of a piece of music. For instance, instead of directing ourselves to “play this leap at goal tempo,” we could aim to “play slower to feel safer.”
I want to acknowledge that it was through the support of friends, colleagues, teachers, and therapists that I was able to form a new approach to playing. We all need some self-love, love of the music we play, and love from our community to foster a healthy relationship with music!
Interested in more? Learn all about breathing, and how this fundamental function impacts your practice sessions!
